So, here is a breif synopsis of this fabulous holiday adventure.
Let your memories grow stronger and stronger until they're before your eyes.
-Regina Spektor "The Call"
1. Wake up in the guest bedroom, surrounded by paintings of Utah Landscapes by my illustrious great-grandmother Xarrissa Clarke, who lived much of her life in Iran, but lived in Utah in her late middle-aged years. I love having art in the house.
2. Realizing I am still wearing what I wore last night, I trudge toward the kitchen and make myself a bowl of Fruty Pebbles...which is far too sweet, so i try to balance it out with a slice of pumpernikel bread which we pilfered ( I almost said philandered...but realized that this particular rye bread and I have had no sexual relations) from a delicious diner at the Las Vegas Cheesecake Factory ( My First Time!).
3. I read Possession while rolling around on the air mattress in the living room for several hours. I haven't showered or changed and I care very little.
4. During this time I have also lapsed into long, drawn out sessions of wall-gazing introspection and private emotional hysterics. The longer I stay in one place, and allow my mind to wander to realities best left alone, the more I descend into a kind of paradoxical sane-madness. I think that since the world is absolutely fallen and bezerk, in order to survive at all we must armor ourselves against the little realities. We either wear the armor deep inside us unconsciously ( most of the happy-go-lucky time) or outside of ourselves ( during the times we understand that we are acting in certain ways as a result of a messed up universe) or we foolishly try to understand the realities of the universe without armor on-both acknowleging the crazy universe, and feeling the effects head-on. This results in emotional hysterics.
5. Roll around on my parents bed while the Las Vegas Sun's harsh rays come through the blinds and ponder about the exact moment of my conception. Not like my parents...but really. Like all that has happened and what it meant to the world when that zygote came into being. I begin to wonder if I was a mistake ( not by my parents...but in the larger scheme of things) and ponder a little more on the cosmic significance of conception and human creation-particularly in terms of me. I decide that if I keep thinking that cosmically in relation I will lose the ability to function normally. I roll off of the bed and keep reading.
6. Reading Possession. Good Book. A.S. Byatt.
7. Check my e-mail to see if anyone has e-mailed me. Nope. Not even Whatshisname, whom I have written to several times ( Hey readers...what are the rules about "Who" and "Whom"?) already. I stare at the ceiling for a few seconds and pull dorky faces at the mirror. I try to figure out why Whatshisname hasn't written back and decide that he must be tired of me and wish me dead for some undisclosed reason. This disturbing thought rests in the back of my mind for the rest of the day.
8. Go shopping with my older sister. We go to Kohl's, Bed Bath and Beyond and Walmart. I buy the sexiest cashmere Argyle sweater ever ( 100.00...but there was a sale...so it was significantly less than that.), and a nice teacher shirt and a sweater for my new brother Paul. I also buy some knitting needles so that I can learn how to knit.
9. When I am at my parents'( or should I say marents'? Our lingual obsession with the paternal is weird. More on that later...) house I am loud and dorky and obnoxious the whole time. My hair is big, my eyes are big, my voice is big and my personality is big. I would have been one of those babies that would have survived in the ice age because I would demand attention and get fed more. I don't live in the ice age, nor do I have the irresistable cuteness of an infant. These big traits of mine become problematic in the real world...especially because most of the time the things I say and do SHOULD be ignored by the rational of mind.
10. Go to the Gym. The Gold's Gym here is very nice. I did eliptical. I was sweaty and happy. Gyms are great.
11. Come home and take a looooooong sudsy, shampooy shower. Ooooooooo Ahhhhhhhhhh.
12. I hang out in a towel for a little while and enjoy that good clean feeling. I also note how nice my skin looks and feel after I moisturize it right out of the shower. I decide that I have a sort of clean prettiness when I come out of the shower. I check my email again ( nope...no new messages) and hang out in a towel for a little while longer.
13. It is maybe like 2 o'clock in the afternoon. My mom comes in and panics me into getting dressed. The whole family goes out and plays Bocci Ball ( an ancient roman lawn bowling game...way fun). We play for a nice long while. It's way fun. It's also way cold and Natalie's toes and mine are numb...and then later in pain. We waddle toward the car after the game and mom helps us thaw them out.
14. We all go home and eat delicious enchiladas.
15. I roll out some of the dough I made yesterday ( and while you may love your mother's cookies...my mom's cookies soundly beat hers into crackers) and cut out and bake some shapes while everyone else watches Iron Man. My shapes? Mostly Camels. I also help Natalie make her first batch of cookies by herself. Note...she is better than me at Bocci ball...and skiing.
16. Tickle war with tally.
17. Listen to Paul read Christmas Carol ( which I have never read) aloud, while Heidi teaches me how to knit....I am not very good at it. I plan to practice though. Heidi has given me her thicker knitting needles to practice with. She also helped roll some of my new eco friendly ( made from recycled plasic bottles) blue yarn into a ball.
10. Came and checked my e-mail again...no messages. Gave myself a pep-talk about how emotional attachment is a self-destructive waste of time. Took over an hour to convince myself enough to be ok for the night.
11.Worked on memorizing "Good King Winceslas", mostly for cultural-knowlege purposes.
12.Wondered how my hair dried into such a strange pyramid shape ( curly-haired sistren...you know what I speak of.) I also make note that I must buy Possession because it deserves some quotable underlinage.
13. Wrote this rather humorous blog post.
Merry Christmas to All and to All a Good Night!
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