Sunday, December 6, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
- Eve in "Children of Eden"
Drop everything and go and see this play tonight. I think that tonight is the last night.
Go and see it. Just, stop what you're doing and buy a ticket. Paper-shmaper- it can wait.
- No sexist tale of coming from a rib nonsense- both male and female created together at the same time (as the biblical account actually says- believe it or not! Gen 1:27
- Eve played her part a little ditzy
- Pretty positive notion of Eve though- in the long run- for a non- mormon perspective
- BYU vocal talent makes the broadway soundtrack sound like a high school garage band. I can't buy the soundtrack now.
- Very cool to see a dramatic version of God- with passions and "gasp" even a few flaws
- It's more a story about God, as a parent, and how one learns to deal with children who can disappoint and think for themselves, than it is about the actual children
- Both Adam and Eve name the animals- rock on
- I still can't get "Spark of Creation" out of my head
- Still no Divine Feminine- someday I will direct this and make some changes- but God was such and intriguing character and had such an excellent voice in this production that I'm gonna let it slide
- Great message of agency. No seriously. Great message of agency- I'm still thinking about it.
- The line "Dear God, we know that you don't talk to us anymore." railed against all of my Mormon sensibilities. I may have actually taken a non-conscious audible intake of breath when it was said. Still- it does feel like that sometimes, doesn't it?
- Did I mention the vocalists?
Revision of last post: Actually asked on 5 dates this week and attended two- both with TallBlondeVocalist- one Salt Lake concert, one dinner at Spark.
I still need to write on 7-10 page paper, one 5 page paper, one impressive 5 day lesson plan, and who KNOWS what else.
Oh, and don't let me forget to talk about the interesting thing that happened yesterday- cause I don't have time to right now.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Also, why can't I ever spell awful correctly (aweful anyone?)?.
On a happier note, I made Malibu chicken today for the dinner group. Everyone ate until they couldn't walk (especially DentalSchoolMan since he is on crutches.). This is the mark of a winning dinner. I score.
The social rundown...
Asked out on three dates this week, but could only attend one, with TallBlondeVocalist, to a concert in Salt Lake. I'm averaging about one concert a week. Pretty nice.
Every other day was booked. I am going to see Children of Eden tonight...I'll probably write something about it if it inspires me. I also get to go to "Celebration of Christmas" on Saturday- which should be fun and...festive...?
Today I had my video interview for job internships. I was told I did very well and that I had "quite a vocabulary." I am still trying to figure out what that means (?).
Hopefully I will be able to get a good job- most likely in the Jordan district. I'm thinking of living in Salt Lake City, which has always been my plan. If I don't get a good internship here, I am garunteed one in Washington D.C.- but without pay. Anything without pay is rapidly becoming not my favorite thing. Even so, the good District is probably my favorite city in the world.
Wait for me.
Tomorrow I've got to do two important things. I've got to somehow teach a seminary lesson, and write a 7-10 page paper. Good luck me....I will not sleep this entire night.
Life is exhausting- but the only thing I hate more than exhaustion is failure.
Another thing- working on maintaining and developing new relationships takes a lot of work, particularly since I will be about as far- hemispherically- as I can possibly get in about four weeks. As a result, I've been in an open relationship for a while. This makes things a bit confusing for all parties involved- but since this is just fun mode, it could always be worse.
Egad! I've got to go now and see Children of Eden. Halestorm awaits.
And...it's my Dad's birthday. Happy Birthday DAD!
Here, for you listening pleasure, is the new Megan Harris song of the week- David Archuleta (from the concert I saw), singing the most beautiful version of Fields of Gold I've ever heard.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Granted, quite a few intelligent comments...but why is this even an issue?
I will just sit here nicely and type.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
"We are gonna celebrate being young and being alive."
-Miles, in "The Holiday"
In no particular order.
I went on a double date with CaptAmerica, Halestorm, TallBlondeVocalist, and I. We saw Nine. TallBlondeVocalist also bought me a box of Edward Cullen conversation hearts. The hearts all say appropriately creepy things like "Bite Me", "4 Ever", and "I Want U". It was the most hilarious present I've gotten in a while. The box has a great picture of Edward sulking sexily on the cover. It is staring at me right now.
I always have a great time with those guys.
Nine has very impressive animation. Nine also is a bit pompous. If you care to challenge me on this, try to talk about some plot the movie made without sounding pompous. Too little character development and a bit of a cliched plot- but the nerd that I am always appreciates a good metaphor for humanity. Also, a shocking number of dead human bodies.
I've started scuba diving a lot. Two dives just this weekend. Both into natural hot spring cavernous waters. Some pioneers dropped a wagon wheel into the deepest part a century or so ago. I should have some pretty awesome pictures of me, scuba diving, with pioneer artifacts.
The first day I went in I wore a wetsuit. Since it was a natural hot spring, I feared death by boiling, so I took it off. After the dive I noticed the the suit had managed to be pretty shifty in all three important places. Chances are I flashed my instructor in all three important ways. I hope he is skilled in keeping pictures family friendly, or I'll have a very interesting scuba memories to share.
Nevertheless, I dove a lot.
My family came down for Thanksgiving. It was awesome. I love my family.
Lots of food- I made a pie.
Captain Handsome broke down. Captain Handsome broke down on the first day I was needed to teach school, since my mentor teacher had her baby early. Right when Captain Handsome broke down a button popped off of my coat. I looked up to heaven and sighed.
The Captain's clutch had broken. Some mechanic owed my grandpa "a favor." I got the thing fixed for 20 bucks. I am starting to wonder if my grandpa is a mob boss (?).
Somehow the dude was able to drive my car, without a functioning clutch, all the way to American Fork. Mechanics know magic.
Another note, if you are reading one of your favorite blogs, and you see a link and you don't think it is that person you know because they have a very common name and you know someone else who writes on that blog with the same name as them...just don't click on the link. It is always that person.
So, I've decided to start Celebrating Saint Catherine of Alexandria's feast day (which is on the 25th of November) because she is my favorite. I changed my profile picture on facebook to her for the whole day.
Saint Catherine's feast is celebrated by food, but is also a big day for unmarried women (whether over or under 25, all the books and sites seem to disagree), called "Catherinettes", who are then traditionally "crowned", honored, and get to have big parties. Over time the tradition morphed into a thing where unmarried women get to party and buy cool new hats to wear the whole day. I took Halestorm out and we bought great Saint Catherine's Day hats. My hat is the coolest. Your hats cry at night, wishing they were my hat. So sorry.
On the social scene- invited to one play, two times, one movie three times and another movie once, and a concert (which I saw on Catherine's Day), which was very impressive and fun.
Ya, I didn't mention that I went to a concert too. Pictures should be coming to a facebook near you.
I bought some perscriptionless glasses too. He he he.
I am now working two jobs, taking 15.5 credits, and maintain new relationships while getting ready to become a kiwi.
Also, watched the BYU/Utah game on a giant screen, with a screaming uncle. Amazing game.
When I woke up on game day, to go to my early moring deep open dive, I noticed that someone had written "Go Utes" on every car in the parking lot in red window paint.
It was a long and scary drive. I wonder how many BYU people kicked my car as they passed by.
I...I am sure that I am forgetting something. Oh well. Just trying to give everyone a little sample of what has been going on in the past week.
And here, for everyone's rockin' out advantage, is the she-heard-on-the-radio Megan Harris song of the week!
VH1 TV Shows Music Videos Celebrity Photos News & Gossip
Friday, November 20, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
Saturday, November 7, 2009
So, after buying my Christmas Tickets, I bought a single ticket to the Interpretive Dance Concert. I mean, what could be more peaceful, insightful, and calming than a whole night ,alone, with Interpretive Rhythmic Movement and myself? I really do like dance. Besides, I was starting to get worried that I hadn't experienced any (like any) strong emotions regarding a recent event. Maybe, I deduced, if I had a second alone I could process some things and figure out if I was moving on too fast. This seemed a healthy plan.
I announced to the masses that I wished to schedule nothing on Friday night, and that I was going to take some time to myself. That afternoon a friend called and invited me to the very same dance concert. I told the friend that I had already purchased a ticket. My friend attempted to purchase a ticket at the door, but found that the entire weekend was sold out. Waving goodbye, I began to search for my seat.
Running into several people I knew, I made small talk on my way to my seat.
"Oh expletive.", my neurons shouted as I noticed the presence of a most disliked, and unexpected guest. "How annoying.", my other neurons sighed, shrugging their electrically charged synapses. I immediately turned around and headed back down to the hallway, and milled about for a little while, suddenly wishing that I had left with my friend instead.
How a kick-trash lady, such as myself, ever ends up in these nightmares, I've no idea.
As the lights dimmed, I decided that ,as it was a large seating area and dim theater, chances of running into/getting recognized by anyone unpleasant would be small. That was until I found my seat....directly behind the irksome entity. Like, literally, exactly one row behind. Exactly. Lined up perfectly. So much for meaningful art-induced introspection. Now I was just embarrassed and perturbed. A long stream of catty comments, harsh rhetoric, and plain old-fashioned obscenities circled in my head until the lights dimmed and I was enclosed in the warm cocoon of music.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
*Shaking hips like an automaton"Dancing Santa."*
Men's Chorus Date, Men's Chorus Date, Men's Chorus Date, hey hey hey hey!
I'm excited. *sheepishly dragging foot in circular motion on floor while looking shyly upward*
Sorry. I had to remove the dates. They just didn't look very appetizing.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Nov. 1, 2009
Dear Pres. Uchtdorf:
Way to stand up for questioners! Way to have such a positive outlook, and be genuinely eternally centered and uplifting! After a hard day of church I really needed that Pres. Uchtdorf!
Excellent Conference talk by the way. If you don't do anything too crazy during your administration, I'll name one of my house plants and/or adopted orphans ( sorry, I try not to do dogs, out of kindness to the dogs. I mean have you seen my houseplants? Me neither. I would take care of orphans though, cause they are fresh minds to mold.) after you.
Though I am glad I had a date to your talk, so that I didn't have a guilt trip. :)
-Ms. Megan Harris
This one qualifies.
Not to say it was the single most brilliant piece of cinematic craft I've ever seen. It is simple and beautiful yet ridiculously compelling. Ridiculously. What the Japanese would call "wabi sabi".
While painfully beautiful it is not devoid of human lightness, irony and humor- including a rather hilarious sequence involving a Valentine...well, at least hilarious to me. It's still up for debate whether Valentines ( or emotions) were really that insanely serious back then. But then again, I've seen and heard funnier things in this *ahem* most rational and exalted day. Bright Star shows that life was just as strange and invigorating, slow and fast, as it is today.
On another note- Jane Campion's cinematography, will you marry me?
Quick, seriously. Grab a date and go! Seriously! Go by yourself if you must! There is enough hot English chastity in this film to compensate for any actual hot American chastity you might be experiencing with a date.
Seperately, regarding "Let the right one in."- Swedish Film
Bright Star is much more romantic than "Let the right one in.", though it is also painfully beautiful.
"Right One" seemed, to me, to delve gently into areas of sexual ambiguity ,not of orientation but of actual organs. What is a person when you can't define them but love them? How does the ambitiousness change your relationship?
The Ambiguity theme carried on into the violence of the vampire child. Can two children share a tender kiss while one is completely covered in the blood of its last victim? Can you hurt someone simply by putting them where they are not invited? To the point of bleeding out of the ears, mouth and eyes? "Right One" challenged me with paradoxical images...at least paradoxical on the mainstream screen. Beautiful violent children. Humans making vampires bleed. A daughter sucking her father's blood and throwing him out of a seventh story window, out of love. A romance without sexual organs.
Dang, I haven't been so confused since the bound-to-fail dating techniques of Nosferatu.
Dang, I've got to go. I'm having people over soon!
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Sunday: Cruising down from the Salt Lake temple, not really paying attention in the carpool lane. First ticket. 15 miles over the speed limit. I was just lucky I guess. Even luckier that I didn't have my license with me (it was in the scanner at work, where I had scanned it for a government document). Even luckier that it had expired. Lucky Lucky me. Day one....then
every check I've written in the last three months was apparently cashed, all in one weekend. Not expecting this, I didn't check my account. Two "overdraft protection notice" alerts later...I'm like, who ate my entire checking account!
I've officially had to get a ride to the DMV...twice...in order to get a new license. And each time I sat there for two hours and have had to leave before being served due to work or class.
Miata falls terribly ill. Uncool. Uncool. Especially because I can do nothing about it.
Decided to get my mind off things by going to the gym. The gym has, apparently, been renovating and has been charging 15 bucks every six months ...to my old credit card, which is now expired. They have not been telling me this. I have apparently been charged a late fee as well, since the uninformed charges to the expired card have seemed to come up with nothing. Once I got in the weight room, I noticed my shirt was on backwards. I worked out in it anyway. On the way home, as I crossed the crosswalk, someone honked at me. I shot her/him a look of death. They probably cried on the way home, that look was so dark.
That and various young love emotional garbage betwixt me and his highness The Prince of Monaco, have left me feeling a little ragged. I think that I just get all my pain at once, so that the rest of the month can sail smoothly.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
The woman in charge of setting up my schedule for the upcoming semester has not e-mailed me back. I've still got to finish my NZ application. It seems very unlikely that I will be able to finish my schooling by the end of next summer due to a university inspired lack of available spots. The resulting unnecessary extra semester throws off many large plans. This blog has been acting freake' when opened on explorer, so I may have to go without witty pictures for a while. I haven't written on my other blogs in forever. I'm still stuck in my old job. Is my life a nightmare or what?
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
-thought that goes through Megan's head the most when hanging out with her significant other...for more reasons than one.
The realization started when a beloved high school friend decided to tag me in some photos from the illustrious Ohio senior year. At the time, I was all but romantically involved with a suitor I shall call "School." Now School and hung out all the time . When I wasn't at School's place, I was thinking about School, planning when I'd see School again, and trying desperately to stay in School's good graces. To be fair, School was pretty into me. There were weeks, months, nay....semesters, when it felt like I couldn't get School off of me. School and I were tight. My parents and a good number of my friends were very supportive of my strong relationship with School. I really invested in School my senior year though, and much to my horror, it showed. Photographically, it showed. Since I really wasn't attempting to attract other potential relationships, all the pictures of School and I featured yours truly in dreadful sweats, hair amok. The worst part though was the general increase in how...um....cuddly I looked in some of these photos. Now, nothing grotesque, and I was probably about the same size as now...it was really more of a lack of sportswomanish physique than anything. School and I used to have a very active relationship, playing sports, jogging to school...but beginning in my junior year, and culminating in the senior one, School and I resigned ourselves to more...sedentary/literary pastimes. I kindly untagged (wince).
But really, who could blame me! Such extravagant lunches. So many competition brunches, long debate trips graced with celebration dinners, and not to mention every kid with a cupcake-happy mom had a birthday...and six periods of birthday-laden classes at that!
Once I got to college I started dating gentlemen of a less metaphorical variety. This was even worse. People Relationships are the homes of the dreaded trifecta-
A: Boys are nice. Attractive boys are nicer. I would not be in a relationship with unattractive boys. Being near attractive boys fills me with fuzzy endorphins, contentment and a “smile while rolling around in the sun for hours” feeling seldom seen since the Land of the Lotus Eaters. So, after spending an afternoon or evening with a boyfriend I usually spend the next three hours draped over a couch eating chocolates and humming romantic show tunes. This is not conducive to an active, healthy lifestyle.
B. Relationships are accompanied by a bizarre, but unavoidable, desire to be with the other almost all of the time. I have a gym membership. The significant other does not. Due to dietary choices and genetic lottery winnings, he is blessed with things like “upper-body strength” and “a lean, sexy core”, naturally. Once a relationship is entered into, the gym becomes part of the “utterly undesirable activities which require separation from boyfriend” list, right between “Shoot self in thigh.” and “Go to the moon.”
C. Boyfriends reciprocally tend to find me attractive. This leads to the doubly detrimental behavior of providing me with food and telling me they find me attractive no matter what. So now, instead of my single life, plagued with with an imaginary voice forever warning me of health-depleting caloric intake and potential boy- repulsing “fluffiness”, I am now plagued with an actual voice inviting me over for cheesecake, while commenting how much he enjoys how “soft” my stomach is.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Megan: I don't want to talk to you right now.
Universe: What? Why? You usually can't wait to talk to me.
Megan: Are you trying to kill me?
Universe: Well...I suppose in the very looooong run, yes, but in the short term I kind of like you living...plus you've got that Jesus guy.
Megan: Well, then explain to me how I could have my keys in my hand this morning, and not this evening.
Universe: Well, an object at rest stays at rest....
Megan: Come now, none of that. Where are my keys! For serious. This charade stopped being funny like a loooooong time ago.
Universe: Well, I'm sure they're somewhere around here.
Megan: Well, you are the Universe, for cryin' out loud. Can't you tell me where they are?
Universe: *blink blink* Do you have ANY idea how much is going on with me right now.
Megan: Ya, well, I sometimes forget how big you are.
Universe: Are you calling me fat?
Megan: No, more like "ever expanding." I'm sure it's all muscle though.
Universe: Darn right. Hey, didn't you get like five copies of your keys just in case this happened.
Megan: Yep. Bad news being that none of them seem work in the ignition.
Universe: Well...wow. That does bite something fierce.
Megan: This begs the interesting question of whether or not I was created to do anything right. I mean, I try my best, but everything seems to go wrong anyway. I mean, I spend about 90 percent of my day worrying about stuff- like hard core. Are there people in the Universe who don't worry all that often?
Universe: Yes. But they're usually dead, or about to be. But really Megan, you've got great friends who love you and are waaaay nicer to you than you are to them, you're surviving school, you have an income, and what about that pretty boy you got recently.
Megan: You're right. I really like him.
Universe: And your family is really great too, and really love you.
Megan: Maybe you're right universe. Maybe I really do have it really really good, and so far nothing has killed me yet. Everything really does seem to work out....except me on certain days. *self-amused chuckle*
Oh, and I just found my keys.
"Due-bee Due-be Due"
- Megan's brain crooning like Frank Sinatra while the teacher keeps talking about all the things that are due in the next week. Brain, keepin' me entertained.
Monday- large paper defending my position on whether or not english language acquisition strategies ought to be taught.
Large Presentation given defending my position on in-service teaching in low ELL school districts
Tuesday- Create a large project center teaching a basic idea of the SIOP program
Doctor's appointment that morning
Wed- Large paper of death designed to kill me, presenting project with ELL families
Large Presentation on vocabulary teaching
Large project on creating centers based on verisimilitude as related to war of the worlds, using the topic of "optical illusion"
Friday- Go to the zoo
During all of this I still have to go to work...where there resides an "all-powerful" and condescending creature of death who does not seem to be happy until all the joy is sucked out of my day. True story.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
-Next to Normal
No matter how little I've eaten that day, or how small the servings actually are, or how much broccoli and freshly picked basil I've added to it...eating an entire bowl of "Cars" shaped macaroni and cheese always makes me feel like a third grader on the high road to heart disease.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
So, my original black eyebrows are growing back in, mixed in with the blonditude of the others. Right now I suffer from a kind of zebra-brow, with dark black and blonde mixing in strange patterns. Now, no one really seems to notice except me, but I tell ya, I have had my eyes opened to the intricacies of eyebrow hair growth. I can now see, in detail, how fast they grow, and naturally fall out, and where the growth is at the highest rate. Consider it part of my ever growing body-awareness.
Nevertheless, I still look presentable.
On another note, as I slowly free myself from the chrysalis that is my 18 credit school schedule, and my recent Language Acquisition Science and School Law Class exploits this summer, I've noticed that my social life looked a little like my under-nourished mint plant....that is...undernourished. So, I've decided to try to up my social comings and goings and get back to that happy place of never ending parties which may or may not have actually existed in my high school experience (I think I overworked myself then too.).
At the same time I am attempting to broaden my friend base with the many groups of new and interesting people I have come across in my various journeys.
This Just In: I like people.
I like likeable people, that is. Darn shame that I only seem to know likeable people. I fantasize about being some sort of monarch/president/benevolent tyrant where I can pick a cabinet of counselors and cabinet members- because my friend base is skilled, talented, beautiful, and widely (wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiidely) diverse in interests. Just once, I want to (while wearing something impressively chic) turn and say "I'll have to discuss it with my counselors." and then retreat a few paces, and whisper contemplatively with a few select friends and associates, carefully balancing their wise and knowledgeable opinions into the perfect solution.
I have boring fantasies.
Also, LittleSister....your graduation invitation is come. Not only are you a genius, but beautiful. I can't wait to hang out with you and have adventures when you come on down.
MusicallyDerivedName it was lovely to speak with you and celebrate your birthday-even if I was "crazy-eye" tired and spoke nothing of interest the entire time. If you take over the world before I, I promise to be better as a member of the cabinet.
Miata, "Who ate my entire PIE!"
I adored shopping with you, and watching that great movie. So sorry that homework swallowed you today (homework swallows me for months at a time...like Pinocchio.), and perhaps we should go swimming at my pool (which is now heated! Bwahaha!) sometime. Bring the lovely Kreme girl while you are at it. I shall add her to my friend-pertoire (like repertoire...but a replaced first syllable).
Anyway-I've got to go and speak to my dear man Jim (sigh...the Gym) who I haven't seen in a while due to my Timp-o-bogus fall earlier last month.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Bright Blonde Eyebrows.
Now, I knew that H2O2 had bleaching properties. All those "Oxy-Clean/Wash/Magic Potions" include H2O2. Anne Frank used H2O2 to bleach the darker hair on her face. But I didn't expect results so drastic, so quickly. My eyebrows are several shades lighter than my actual hair. It looks kind of freaky. I have attempted to remedy this problem by spraying my hair with a diluted H2O2 solution every morning, and hope that since the eyebrow to head hair ratio has a higher turnover, the eyebrows might even out over time with the slower lightening of my hair.
But that's just the first of it.
Now, I never grew up with blonde eyebrows. I always had dark ones, which I have slowly adapted to.
Blonde eyebrows on me look kinda bushy. They blend in with my already hyper-white skin tone, so my forehead is becoming one giant brow. The lighter color also draws the eye to them, accentuating their natural fullness. It gets even harder to tame them, since when I went to wax the babies, I couldn't tell where to start. With dark eyebrows, at least I could see when I had brow-o-clock shadow. Now, it's just a rather bushy-looking brow-mystery (brow-stery?).
Now, I'll be the first to admit that ,after some highly calculated time, when I look good I can look GOOD....but when I look bad.....I look BAAAAAAAAAD. Seriously.
An excellent example being all the rather unflattering shots I've had to untag (with the clicking speed and attitude of one playing a violent computer game... "Die Zombie Photos DIE!") of my recent excursion to Capitol Reef National Park and Goblin Valley State Park.
It rained the whole time, and when I'm focusing on outcome (like hiking or education) I care very very little for how I look...as long as I live under the delusion that I look dang good. Nothing like a little slap in the face with the reality fish . ( " Great, pictures! Let me see! Hey, where'd my chin go? Who invited that unflattering extra padding on my person! What is THAT! That can be photoshoped, right?")
But by far the strangest thing was the blonde...blonde eyebrows.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Wait....actually, I do have all the time in the world...I just fill it with busy stuff. I need to meditate (something I do for half an hour...once a week...maybe...oh, be quiet!) and chill out....the only problem being that my meditation always looks a little something like THIS...
Monday, May 18, 2009
So, while taking a stroll around campus tonight, a hidden cat LEAPED out of a garbage can not 6 inches from my person. I screamed really loudly. Everyone within 100 feet saw and heard the nefarious cat-tack. Freaked me out.
Also, at work today, I sat down in my sturdy four legged rolly chair...and promptly fell over backwards.
Sturdy MY FOOT....no seriously...my foot was the only sturdy thing in the room. Between chair-batoge and cat-tacks I'm starting to wonder if I've cheated death or something, and the universe is just trying to catch up.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
So, I've decided to take a mental vacation...because I can't take a real one. I do this periodically. I just pretend that nothing I do matters (then I do it anyway), and it almost feels... kinda like... a break... of some kind. Updates will continue after I finish my homework. And man, am I behind on my other blogs or what!
-I wanna free fall out into nothing. I wanna leave this world for a while.
So, I'm hitting the point of "run and hide" exhaustion. Like, I need a vacation... from life. Seriously. Not to say I haven't hit this point many times before. It's just this time, I get the feeling that if I'm not careful I might actually die...at least on the inside.
I'm getting lost in everything (Homework? What homework?), and there are days when I swear I could just sit, comatose, on my bed all day, and just watch the world go by. There are other days when I want to run, screaming, out to anywhere. Just away.
I need a break I think. A big loooooooong break.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Sometimes I run into a blog post that really just talks about some things that have really bugged me for a long time. While no one can really express my opinions as well as I can (they being my opinions and all), I will post three articles that address things I've been too lazy (not unimpassioned) to post myself.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Tatiana Proskouriakoff is today's awesome, don't ignore,intelligent fabulous, fashionable, and just plain cool person of the day.
I'm always keeping my eyes open for cool people. I found her here
Just go about half way through the link.
Man, some people are just so cool.
Friday, May 1, 2009
First of all, let me say that I got all A's, so my scholarship is sounding pretty solid right now. Horray! Now i am down to a very interesting point. Whether it is better to go to New Zealand and then do a year-long internship in Mexico (more adventure, plus it forces me to learn Spanish...which is by far the sexiest thing that ever happened to a principal's resume since those chic leather portfolio cases, and those sexy-administrator pencil skirts (check and ...check).
Another point of interest is that I've contracted a virus...the uutdoor adventure virus. I had felt the bug coming on as early as my grand British Excursion of 08' but my recent trip the Zion National Park has sealed the deal. Be careful, I may or may not be contagious.
I've decided that I want to go on more and more adventures. Next trip...perhaps Arches National Park...or there is lots o' hiking/camping at the Navajo Nation (another place where I could teach).
I actually went into Sportsman's warehouse, and here is the rundown; 200 dollar sleeping bag...for 50 dollars on sale, coasteering (mountaineering, but on the coast) wetsuit on sale for 40$, five person tent for $130.
I want them all. I want to GO ON AN ADVENTURE!
I'm also on the hunt for a nice mountain bike. Those babes sometimes price up to 400 and 500 dollars. I shall save up.
It's women's conference today, and campus is packed, particularly the BYU bookstore. Another thing it is packed with is fine art from Cassandra Barney (daughter of James C. Christiansen...one of my favorite mormon artists...of which there are few. There were quite a few pieces of art there...running from 50 to 3000 bucks. When I grow up and have a big-kid life (oh, dang...that's practically now.) I want a few things.
A: A master's degree
B: Adventures...lots of adventures. Adventures that involve beautiful scenery, new places, and the awesome sleeping bag I'm going to buy.
C: Lot's of beautiful framed artwork all over the house. In pretty dark-wood frames with gold accents.
D: A bookshelf full of pretty leather-bound classics...which I will have read, and another of great theological works.
also..a sexy hybrid car. But I'd be willing to give up all of this stuff for just a life of peace, you know? Real peace...and adventures.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
So, I am scared spitless right now. I haven't even looked at my grades yet. I've put it off until I was able to finish a few other big projects, but now I must look and see. Three or four of the classes did not post scores up on blackboard, and I wax worried, because I never can tell how I did. I know I've got an A on a few...but the other ones can spring up outta nowhere and eat your offspring if you're not careful. Anyway...ramble...how I ramble...
Goodnight everyone. I hope someday to be chill about life.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
So, I've decided that The Weepies, the Indie band extraordinaire, is now on my list of pleasing people whose coolness I would like to emulate, and whose talents I love to adore.
To the right you can hear their song "I've gotta have you."
You shall be as in love as I.
Also, I hiked all over Zion National Park with 8 of the coolest people I have ever met...and I had awesome adventures.
I shan't speak of it now, as I am tired, and on my way to a late night gym touch-and-go.
I just thought I like to say I love you all.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
I often suffer from a lack of self-expression outlets. Here are three things I honestly wish I could do.
Sing-like really sing. Sing the songs I love, belting them high and loud so that they sound great. I wish I could display my passions, particularly my religious ones (I really like "come thou fount" and "press forward saints", and "Oh my father" to the tune of "come thou fount"...and "truth reflects upon our senses"). So yes, I really wish I could sing.
Write Plays- Every time I see a moving play, I always think...I have so many great ideas...I wish I could write a play about it. Nothing reaches the heart like theater. Maybe I'll take a play-writing class...just to develope the skill..not that I'd ever be great, but it would a prime outlet for a Megan.
Express Myself well verbally- So many awesome, flawless opinions...so much stupid mouth. If only I had the gift of persuassion...oh the things I'd persuade. Bwahahaha.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
|“Three Rules of Work: Out of clutter find simplicity; From discord find harmony; In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”|
So, I've been thinking about simplicity, and how my life doesn't really have it anymore...and how I want it so badly. Not that I would ever change the growth I've had during the complicated times, but I wish things would be simple again. How simple? It's an interesting question. Since the simplicity I knew before became so painfully complex because it was flawed, then the simplicity I want now is not the same.
It's a simplicity that I have to find and create on my own. Maybe that's what growing up is? Simplicity followed by complication then a battle back to a new, better, simplicity, which then becomes complicated. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Perhaps that is what Christ did, from a God, in all his glorious, perfect simplicity, to a man in this complicated world, to a glorious simple Godhood, greater because of the complications it overcame.
Humor is simplicity, solution is simplicity. I intersperse my complicated life with simple thoughts, laughs, songs and dances. The longer I live I find that simplicity is rest, and complication is work, and the juxtaposition is what we call joy.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
"It don't really matter. When life gets that much harder, it makes you that much stronger."
So, tonight is gonna be an ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHTER! (*woot*)
Now, while it is often said that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I dunno. I tend to think that what doesn't kill you makes it much more likely that you'll die sooner. Ejemplo-
Person: *BANG* Ha! I shot you! If you live through this...just think of how strong you'll be!
*Two months later...standing by the victim, being sustained by an iron lung*
Person: Well...Hm. I wonder why that didn't work.
I've had more papers assigned than I can currently handle...and I'd like to say that I've procrastinated....but I haven't . I've been doing my assignments with all the time that has been available. That time would be....*looks at calender*...oh...today. This evening actually.
Now, we shall either see a disaster or a miracle. Will the Megan overcome the odds, and strained emotions (Mind: "Oh! Nobody LIKES ME!" Brain:"Oh, shut up. Dramaqueen.") and finish so many papers and a large presentation due tomorrow? Tune in next time.
Also...the guy ahead of me in line bought the last Passover ticket. I am now on the waiting list.
Don't worry. So far, nothing has killed me. :D
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Today's thought provoking link of the day is from ZD. Below.
"I'm so glad that I'll never fit in. That will never be me."
For your reading pleasure I offer this interesting scientific discovery from BYU.
No wait....since I know none of you will click on the link...I will break Blog-iquette by just copy-pasting it here. Click on the link too, for good measure..plus there are some pretty fantastic pictures..and the site might track its hits. So be nice.
Hire a Dwight Schrute for a better-performing team, prof
Nobody wants to share a cubicle with a new hire like Dwight Schrute. The beet-farming volunteer sheriff's deputy/paper salesman creates many awkward moments because of his differences with co-workers on NBC's "The Office."
But according to new research co-authored by a Brigham Young University business professor, better decisions come from teams that include a "socially distinct newcomer." That's psychology-speak for someone who is different enough to bump other team members out of their comfort zones.
Researchers noticed this effect after conducting a traditional group problem-solving experiment. The twist was that a newcomer was added to each group about five minutes into their deliberations. And when the newcomer was a social outsider, teams were more likely to solve the problem successfully.
The research is published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
"One of the most-cited benefits of diversity is the infusion of new ideas and perspectives," said study co-author Katie Liljenquist, assistant professor of organizational leadership at BYU's Marriott School of Management. "And while that very often is true, we found the mere presence of a newcomer who is socially distinct can really shake up the group dynamic. That leads to discomfort, but also to a better process that ultimately yields superior outcomes."
The key factor is simply whether newcomers are distinct in some way from the other group members.
"Remember, socially 'distinct' doesn't necessarily mean socially 'inept,'" says Liljenquist, whose co-authors on the paper are Katherine Phillips of Northwestern's Kellogg School of Management and Margaret Neale of Stanford's Graduate School of Business. "Dwight's upbringing and past work history - in addition to his bobblehead doll collection - all contribute to the measure of diversity he brings to 'The Office' melting pot."
The paper adds a new wrinkle to the wealth of research on teams, says Melissa Thomas-Hunt, associate professor at Cornell's Johnson School of Management.
"[This research] is groundbreaking in that it highlights that the benefits of disparate knowledge in a team can be unleashed when newcomers actually share opinions of knowledge with old-timers but are socially different," Thomas-Hunt says. "It is the tension between social dissimilarity and opinion similarity that prompts heightened effectiveness in diverse teams."
What explains the results?
According to Liljenquist, newcomers in the experiment didn't necessarily ask tougher questions, possess novel information, or doggedly maintain a conflicting point of view. Just being there was enough to change the dynamic among old-timers who shared a common identity.
When a member of the group discovered that he agreed with the new outsider, he felt alienated from his fellow old-timers - consequently, he was very motivated to explain his point of view on its merits so that his peers wouldn't lump him in with the outsider.
The person who found himself disagreeing with the in-group - and instead agreeing with an outsider - felt very uncomfortable. An opinion alliance with an outsider put his social ties with other team members at risk.
"Socially, that can be very threatening," Liljenquist says. "These folks are driven to say, 'Wait, the fact that I disagree with this outsider doesn't make me weird. Something more is going on here; let's figure out what's at the root of our disagreement.' The group then tends to analyze differing opinions and critical information much more thoroughly, and that facilitates much better decision-making results."
The experiment also revealed a fallacy in the assumptions we make about our own effectiveness in groups. The subjects in the experiment were members of different fraternities and sororities. In general, when the newcomer was from the same sorority or fraternity as the other team members, the group reported that it worked well together, but was less likely to correctly solve the problem.
In contrast, when the newcomer was a member of a rival sorority or fraternity, the opposite was true - these groups felt they worked together less effectively, yet they significantly outperformed socially homogenous groups.
"What's really distinct about this research is that, from a self-reporting perspective, what people perceive to be beneficial turns out to be dead wrong," Liljenquist says. "The teams that felt they worked least effectively together were ironically the top performers!"
In the workplace
Common "social distinctions" in today's workplace, Liljenquist says, would include:
• One employee from accounting working on a team in which everyone else is from sales
• An employee of a company that had just been bought out finding herself on a team of people from the acquiring firm
• An out-of-stater finding himself on a team full of natives of the company's home state
To help employees in those situations cope, managers would be wise to explain that such conflict can actually generate better results.
"Without that information people just assume, 'This is really uncomfortable. My team obviously must not be working effectively,'" Liljenquist says. "The experience in diverse teams may not always be a feel-good session, but if employees know that from the outset, they can better deal with inevitable conflicts and recognize the potential benefits - that the affective pains can translate to real performance gains."
Although Liljenquist acknowledges many other cases for diversity in the workplace, she contends that "reaping the benefits of diverse workgroups doesn't necessarily require that newcomers bring unique perspectives or expertise to the table. Simply having people around us who differ on some dimension ¬- whether it is functional background, education, race or even a different fraternity - drives a very different decision-making process at a group level because of the social and emotional conflict we experience in their presence."
Friday, April 3, 2009
"You better know that in the end, it's better to say too much, than never to say what you need to say again."
Now, I am a Megan of the thinking variety. However, if I had a nickel for every minute of the past few years I sat, crippled by fear and anxiety, when I should have been sharing an important, relevant thought and opinion of my own...I would go diving in them like Scrooge McDuck.
Usually, the thoughts can't be shortened into one sentence pithy statements. They are often very personal. They often need to be said to people who are close to me.
And writing all my thoughts on my various blogs is both tedious and scarey.
Then again, we had a whole lesson in Sunday School about not being afraid to say what you need to say. I shouldn't be so afraid...should I?
Actually yes I should...but that's called bravery Megan...bravery.
So,here is the guy on the Katy Perry Video. I also think that he is on "Kyle XY". He is incredibly good looking. Like...seriously. This is not to say that other people can't be good looking without looking like him...for example...my current interest (how are ya?) but since we of the female gender have been recently accused of having low hormonal drives...I just thought I'd prove you wrong...*looks at all three videos again*...ya..very very wrong.
and the guy on beyonce's video...
and the lead singer of the All American Rejects as seen here (Language warning...but just look at him...in fact...in this music video there are two of him.) Yaaaaaaa.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
- Colin Hays
Morning- GAH! I am such an idiot! I shouldn't get out of bed.
Later- I am surrounded by idiots. They shouldn't have gotten out of bed.
Later- No wait, they are actually smarter than I thought! I am an idiot. I wish I could go to bed.
Later- No, they are ignorant and don't understand their own rational. I am surrounded by idiots. They should go home and stay there.
Later- I am a mean bad person for thinking that and I don't know that much either. I function out of a false sense of importance, and all-important pomposity! GAH! I am such an idiot. I'm going to bed.
Morning- GAH! I am such an idiot! I shouldn't get out of bed.
Why am I crying? I never cry. My tears are made of the blood of angels and unicorns, and are only seen by the pure in heart...or the rare public sightings of my tears would so indicate.
Oh, it's because I just got struck with a fist load of dread that no matter how hard I try to write this paper...it is going to be a B or worse. Oh, "waaaaaah!", you sarcastically decry...but a B means a lot when you depend on a scholarship. A heck of a lot.
Having experienced unexplained failure multiple times...I now have no confidence in myself on this matter.
Writing is probably the biggest fear in my life...well that and marrying a chauvinist.
Unlucky for me, I am at a conservative religious university...a place where both chauvinists and papers abound.
- Joseph B. Wirthlin
Ode to the sure thing re-hire to my old job...now DASHED against the rocky cliffs... due to the fact that one of the current employees has decided to stay on hire instead of going home for the spring-summer.
"I hope something terrible happens to you
or something decently good happens to me as a result of this.
Now I must (no..no...think positive.."get to" ya... "get to") look for a new super-fun-learning-experience-hobby-for-pay...otherwise known as a job. This has the potential of becoming "Not my week."
Monday, March 30, 2009
Oh, Ode to the dreadful winter weather that comes in spring and makes the roads slick and scary!
Front Right Tire! Why do you always lose air faster than the other tires....for no explainable reason...and with stunning consistancy and frequency!
SO it is to be WAR between us!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
I kid you not.
I wrote a post on Isabella and the Pot of Basil. The next day's art: Isabella and the Pot of Basil.
I talk on the phone about the book Possession. As soon as I get home the "art of the day" is "The Beguiling of Merlin"...the cover art for Possession.
Other such coincidences have occurred again and again.
Ever get the feeling that someone...is watching...you?
Friday, March 27, 2009
"Go away world!"
-Thought most often processed right before or after four hour long "power nap".
This is beginning to get disturbing. The last time I slept this much, I was under a lot lot lot of stress.
I am starting to ponder on the possibility that my subconscious mind knows when I've hit my breaking point before my body and conscious mind even feel tired.
I think I'm getting internally overworked, and like my little toshiba, I turn off automatically when overheated, or forced to process at too many gigabytes (Toshiba: "And NOW she wants to watch the Colbert Report! What does she think I AM! A freakin' MAC!")
I have been getting home for the past two weeks... promptly falling asleep for three or four hours after linner (lunch-dinner). I think that I am running from my responsibilities...and reality.
This brings up a few moral/ethical questions to my mind, which I will hash out on a few of the other blogs I co-publish.
Anyway, so, I just woke up...and it's 10:00...PM.
I think I'll go to the gym and start my day now. I've got cleaning checks in the morning, a test to take tomorrow, and tons and tons of papers to write.
I'm in "The Little Engine That Could" mode right now. It's the best I can do...during my waking hours.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
A dear friend of mine recently posted their Myers-Briggs score and some implications.
I thought I'd do the same, in the hopes that I might bring a knowing smile to those who know me, and maybe clear up a few things for my ex-boyfriends, co-workers, teachers and acquaintances.
I am an ENTJ. Truth be told, I hadn't looked at my qualities in a while. When I read them again today, it brought a smile to my face.
Here is a brief description, from the site http://www.personality-power-for-everyday-living.com/ENTJ.html...which is not the official...but get's it pretty well. If you want to get me even more...than you can look up ENTJ's.
ENTJ Definition of Personality Equals “Vision + Drive + Leadership”
The definition of personality for the ENTJ includes the drive to logically analyze people, events, the world and bring everything into order.
You may have come here from the MBTI “words to describe personality” page and you know or suspicion that your personality type is Extraverted with Intuition, Thinking and Judging, because you have taken the Myers-Briggs personality assessment test. Or you may be here because someone you care about is this type. That being the case you can discover many qualities, traits or characteristics describing this personality type on this page.
I’m going to present ENTJ qualities in a list format because I have found reading a paragraph when you are digging for some important, quick information, can be difficult, well it can be irritating! So let us take a look at a list of personality traits for ENTJs. This type:
- Is the one type that cannot, not LEAD….life’s natural leaders
- Will willingly direct others toward the goals/objectives they have set
- Is very decisive and clear about values
- Is naturally driven to push people and organizations to get things done
- Lives for decisions, closure, cannot stand disorganization
- Is a natural skeptic and will question most things
- Is very willing to take on responsibility and get things organized and moving forward
- Sees meanings, patterns, possibilities in all things, future efforts
- Are energetic planners, builders, with future orientation.
- Powerfully sees the natural logical weaknesses in most situations, will tirelessly work and drive others to fix them
- Is not adverse to conflict will fact it head on
Now do you see yourself/someone else in the above basic list of personality traits??
What we really begin to see with personality type is emerging patterns of behaving and using our brains. The ENTJ way is natural, instinctive, beautiful, created to be this way. Let us continue.
Mottos Are Fun
For the ENTJ these mottos or things to put on their battle flag might be: “Just Do It! “I’m In Control-All Will Be Well” “Strategic Planner Lives Here”, to name a few.
Let us make another list of personality traits, ENTJs:
- Are curious intellectually and enjoy new ideas
- Are very utilitarian and pragmatic despite their natural orientation toward the future
- Will have difficulty (sometimes great difficulty) with those unable/unwilling to emote
- Will set high goals for themselves and others
- Enjoy planning for the possibilities in most things and for most people
- Highly value achievement
- Deeply value autonomy and respect power and authority…want it also
- Thinking is symbolic, metaphorical, they see meaning in all things
Now, my friend, the ENTJ not only behaves in the above manner…THEY NATURALLY EXPECT EVERYONE ELSE TO DO THE SAME!!
So, what happens when they see that many others do not behave that way?? (only 3-5% of America’s population is this type) Answer: Different levels of stress, confusion, irritation, etc.; typically nothing this type can’t handle. So, this is a NATURAL reaction on the part of this type, they are not doing anything wrong.
More Stuff The ENTJ:
- Is typically straight forward and frank in communications
- In relationships, they are confident and assertive
- In relationships, they are very willing to decide for others
- In relationships, they will treat you fairly and justly
- In relationships, they can at times appear argumentative, arrogant and critical
- In relationships, at times are insensitive to the feelings and interpersonal needs of others
- May rush to judgment at times
- Very self confident and appear to hold themselves in high regard…rightly so
- May rush to judgment rather than cooperatively considering a mates point of view
- Will not be bound by the expectations of others
Under Stress The ENTJ:
- May become extremely critical of themselves and others
- Will become angry, controlling and blindly issues orders without repect to consequences
- Will begin to strongly doubt themselves
- Under extreme stress they may withdraw, feel hurt, trapped and become over emotional
- May withdraw and strongly criticize others
If this type is you, wonderful, perhaps you now have a better understanding of yourself, and perhaps you can use that increased understanding in many positive ways.
If you see someone else as this type but not you, please pay attention to the differences between your personality and the ENTJ. Try to see that your way and this way are natural and just fine! Look for the positive differences, the strengths this type brings to your type. Celebrate that because it cannot be changed and can add wonderful diversity and truth to your life!!